Ted Lasso Season 4, Episode 6: The No Mud, No Lotus of Mindfulness and Resilience

<p> Hey there, it's Michael. Welcome to Whole Again, the show that's here in support of the person you're becoming and a meaningful life. And I will also say welcome to the messy middle. I'm not necessarily talking about life. I'm talking about season four of Ted Lasso and episode six, because that's where I'm at when it comes to recapping season four.</p>
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<p>I'm not sure about you, but as I watched episode number six, it just felt all gooey and gloppy. They were celebrating New Year's Eve, which felt a little weird to do here in September. We did get to reconnect with Jamie, although that felt weird. And he's still, and I say this with all the love in my heart, still a prick.</p>
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<p>But as I watched him come back into Ted Lasso, I just wondered why. Why is he coming back in? Aren't we supposed to move forward and talk more about the Lady Greyhounds and how that team is shaping up and all the different storylines? And we had all the classic ones in this episode. We had Roy and Keeley and his new doctor friend and some of that relationship drama.</p>
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<p>We had Rebecca and her mate. They make another appearance in this episode. Again, no spoilers, so I'm not going to divulge any more information than that. Coach Beard has another weird moment where he thinks he's younger than he is, so there's a little social rejection going on there. That felt weird and messy.</p>
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<p>We have Ted and Michelle start talking about the messiness and the feelings that come out of divorce. And of course, we have Alice, who I think is being set up for the biggest Kintsugi moment of season four. And I will say, I'm not the only one that thinks that. I think it's pretty, I think it's pretty obvious that she is being at least positioned to have the biggest awakening.</p>
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<p>So if you're looking for a Ted Lasso episode that's all nice and fluffy with all his different sayings that's all cute and country, this isn't really one of them. But if you look at this episode through the lens of our focus here at Whole Again, which is about resilience, then this episode is almost mastery Because true resilience, the true stuff, not the stuff that we just simply post on social media, the true lived experience of resilience isn't about skipping past the painful parts simply to reach the happy ending sooner.</p>
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<p>No, it's about sitting in it like a duck sitting down in the swells of the ocean. There's actually a really good poem around that topic. But it's all about sitting in the uncomfortable stuff, the mud, if you will, without losing ourselves. There's a famous quote by Thich Nhat Hanh, the great meditation teacher, and I tend to live by it.</p>
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<p>It's one of the quotes I live by. "No mud, no lotus." That beautiful flower that blossoms on the lily pad, that lotus, well, it has to grow through the messiness, the dank and the dark and the mud and the mess. It has to grow through all of that to become that beautiful lotus that we celebrate, that we cherish.</p>
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<p>So this episode is the muddy episode from my perspective, or if you look at it through the lens of Joseph Campbell and the hero's journey, which so many great works of art, the stories that we love, the movies that we love, the TV shows that we love tend to have this hero's journey arc. I actually teach a workshop on this to corporate people because they're also living life in this hero's journey.</p>
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<p>So what we know from Campbell's work is this, that every hero, you can even look at Odysseus in The Odyssey, an episode I did several weeks ago. The hero eventually hits the abyss. It's the hero's low point. It's when her old tools simply stop working. The armor breaks, and she's confronted to face her deepest vulnerabilities.</p>
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<p>And we see this play out in episode six. We see it in Roy and his injury. We see it in Coach Beard, as I've mentioned, his reality. We see it with Ted and Michelle and the whole conversation around divorce, and we see it with Alice in her attempt to attend the team's New Year's Eve party, and all she wants to do is rush through it to get it over with.</p>
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<p>And that is completely natural. When we go through life transitions, when we go through things, our natural instinct is to rush through the abyss. We try to fix it. We try to force our way through it, or we try to numb our discomfort. We try to find ways to make it not hurt so badly. But again, resilience isn't about avoiding this phase of our hero's journey.</p>
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<p>It's not about avoiding the fall. Resilience only happens after we have fallen down, after we've gone through something. Resilience is about how we carry ourselves going forward. How do we get back up? How do we move forward? How do we, in my words, keep pedaling? So as you take in episode six, see if you can watch it through the lens or through the lens of the messy middle As you know, I use kintsugi as a metaphor here for Whole Again and my series, A Perfectly Imperfect Union.</p>
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<p>The abyss, if you will, is when the pottery breaks. But as the hero continues on her journey, we find a way to get back up again. We find a way to mix all the metaphors all together, is that we put the pieces back together. We find our urushi, our glue That helps us find our way back home. Again, going back to Odysseus and the Odyssey, it's about man's journey back home.</p>
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<p>So with all these characters in season four, they're all going through their own version of the messy middle. They are going through, in episode six, their version of the abyss or their version of the pottery breaking, and it breaks for each of us a little bit differently, as it does for all the characters in season four.</p>
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<p>But what I think we'll find as we go into episode seven, which comes out today, eight, nine, and 10, is the rest of the hero's journey. So we can take these lessons from this messy middle episode of Ted Lasso and apply it to our lives. We, too, go through our own version of the hero's journey. We go through our life moments, moments where we get knocked down.</p>
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<p>As I mentioned up front, true resilience isn't about rushing through this phase, even though that's our natural instinct. But rather, we find a way to sit in it, not passively, not as the victim, but openly with awareness. This is where mindfulness comes in. So we sit in this moment, and we find a way to bring our resources together, our peloton, as I would say, but those people in our lives that can help us get back up again, and we find ways to take small steps forward.</p>
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<p>And we see this play out with Alice in this episode. She had the support of her girlfriend, and she took a step forward. Now, after taking a step forward, it's quite possible we take a few steps backwards. But then we have the opportunity to take a few steps forward once again, because we know healing and growth is not a linear process.</p>
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<p>It's up and down, sideways, this way, and that way. It's not clean. It's not simple. That's not how life is. So welcome to the messy middle. This is the good stuff. And see where you can apply it to your own life. See where you can allow yourself to be in the moment. Gather those people around you and take one step forward, as imperfect as it might be.</p>
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<p>And as always, thank you for being here. Thanks for listening. I hope you're checking out my new series, A Perfectly Imperfect Union, where I'm talking to everyday folks about their reflections on America as she celebrates year 250. But until the next episode, which is tomorrow, my encouragement to you is to celebrate your scars as golden symbols of your strength and resilience.</p>
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<p>And don't forget to have fun storming the castle. Enjoy watching episode number six. And next week I'll be back with a recap of episode number seven from season four of Ted Lasso.</p>
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<p>And if you wish to learn more about creating beautiful ripples and how to prevent a bad moment from turning into a bad day, please visit my website, michaelobrienshift.com, and sign up for my newsletter called The Ripple Effect. And join us each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday here at Whole Again, and discover how you can heal, grow, and become more resilient, and celebrate our scars as golden symbols of strength and resilience.</p>
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<p>Until then, remember, you can always come back to your breath. You've got this, and we've got you</p>