What is the 'A Perfectly Imperfect Union' series about?

A series airing between May and October featuring conversations with everyday people reflecting on America at 250, with episodes airing every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday

A Perfectly Imperfect Union: Reflecting on America 250 with Robena

Q: How often does The Whole Again Podcast air?

Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday with Pause Breathe Reflect Microdose Meditations

The Whole Again Podcast: Mindfulness and Resilience through Kinstugi Wisdom airs every Monday, Wednesday and Friday with Pause Breathe Reflect Microdose Meditations, Growth Mindset and Mindfulness Tips, to help us transform our scars into healing and resilience.

And between May and October, I'm sharing a new series I'm calling: A Perfectly Imperfect Union. It's about connecting with every day folks as they reflect on America at 250. Conversations will air every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.

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In this episode of A Perfectly Imperfect Union, we travel to Hawaii and visit with Robena.

We talk about aloha as currency, life on an isolated island where everyone has to take care of each other, and why she believes America is, at its core, an aspirational line of thinking.

She traces her family's roots back to 1600s Virginia and a long westward pull that eventually landed her in Hawaii.

Her prescription for healing the country is simple and hard at the same time: more empathy, more patience, and more deep breathing to calm a nervous system stuck in fear.

And her question for you and our next guest is: Are you breathing deeply?

Visit Robena's Galley via this link.

Share your thoughts in the comments and share this episode with one of your neighbors.

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With Whole Again: Mindfulness and Resilience through Kintsugi Wisdom, listeners explore mindfulness and resilience through personal stories of trauma, scars, and injury while learning to overcome, imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and perfectionism with self-compassion, self-love, and self-worth. Through insightful discussions on building resilience, fitness, and stress management, as well as mindfulness practices and digital wellness, the show offers practical tools such as breathwork, micro-dose meditation, grounding techniques, visualization, and daily affirmations for anxiety relief and stress reduction. Inspired by the art of kintsugi, the podcast embodies healing as a transformative process, encouraging a shift in perspective from worry and overwhelm to gratitude and personal growth. By exploring the mind-body connection, micro-dosing strategies for emotional well-being, and

Hey there, it's Michael. Welcome to Whole Again, the show that's here in support of you creating a meaningful life and the person you're becoming. And I'm excited to share a new series with you that will air this summer as America turns 250 years old, which is still pretty young relative to many other countries across this big blue marble that we all share.

The series is called A Perfectly Imperfect Union. In 2022, I rode my bike across America from Astoria, Oregon to the Lincoln Memorial. My wife drove our RV and she had two co-pilots, Jester and Hope, two Springer Spaniels And when we did it, America was coming out of the pandemic and we were hurting.

Hurting from things that had happened prior to the pandemic, of course, going through what we all went through. And at that time, and this is something I still believe today, is that we were entering an inflection point. An inflection point for us to hopefully pause, breathe, and reflect on who we wish to become as individuals, as communities, and as a country.

As I pedaled across America, I wanted to share America's beauty with others, her natural beauty and the beauty of her people. And I also wanted to share where we were hurting As America turns 250, I believe Kintsugi, which is something we use as a metaphor here at Whole Again, is a perfect metaphor for where we are as a country.

There's so much beauty to celebrate, and we can also acknowledge that parts of us feel broken or are broken. But we can find a way to come back together, just like Kintsugi teaches us. And when we do, we don't try to erase or cover up where we have scars or blemishes. We highlight them in gold, and we celebrate them as symbols of our strength and resilience.

Kintsugi is called the golden repair, and in essence, we can see beauty in something that's perfectly imperfect. During this series, I plan to speak to at least two people in each state and the District of Columbia, so 102 conversations with real folk, as I like to say. We're gonna let the celebrities and the big influencers have their day somewhere else.

But here, I wanna reach out and talk to real people and listen to their reflections as they think about America turning 250 years old. And my hope is, is that you'll tune in to at least one, if not all 102, 'cause my theory going into this is that you'll hear different perspectives. Some may be aligned with yours, others may not.

But my hope is that you hear the goodness in your fellow citizens and realize, as Maya Angelou shared with us, "We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike." We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike. I've had the privilege of traveling all over the world and all over this country, and this belief is something that I hold deep inside of me.

So yes, I do believe that we are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike. So if you're ready to get to know one of your perfectly imperfect neighbors, just like all of us, take a healthy breath in and a slow releasing breath out, and get to know Robina.

Well, hello Robina. So good for you to join me on this series I'm calling A Perfectly Imperfect Union. 

Mm. 

How are you feeling 

today? Mm. Well, personally, I'm feeling amazing. You know, that's a, a personal choice, you know? 

Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. So I'm so, I'm so honored to, uh, share space with you on this.

A- as I mentioned before we hit record, we have one of your great works of art hanging in our living room, just a reminder of our great trips to Maui. So we, we... I sort of know you. Obviously, my wife and my oldest have met you in person. But for those that don't know you, can you take a moment to introduce yourself, and what state are you currently in?

Yes. My name's Robina, and I'm a fine artist. I live on Maui in the state of Hawaii, and, um, I- it's beautiful. We love living here. The state is a very, uh, amazing place. It's quite a melting pot. We're very isolated out in the middle Pacific, so, you know, we know what a, a melting pot really feels like, you know?

Yeah. Where everybody has to, you know, take care of each other. 

Absolutely. So we live in a big country, and I know not everyone has had the ple- really the privilege or the pleasure of getting to Hawaii. So I, I know many people think of it as like, "Wow, look, going to Hawaii." It's like, uh, you know, the sort of tropical and beautiful and rainbows and all that.

But for those that haven't been, uh, beyond what is out there in the public domain, what's, what's something special about Hawaii that- someone may not know about if they haven't visited? 

Well, it's not Disney. It's, um You know, I think a lot of people come here feeling like, "Ah, Disneyland," but it's, it's, uh, incredibly beautiful.

Uh, the people, the culture here, uh, it's a long, deep, uh, history, um, that's to be admired, and you feel very humble in the face of it. I feel like being, um, on this island, um, hu- being humble is, like, the currency, you know? Aloha is the currency. Um- Yes ... um, it's very important becau- how you treat each other because- Mm-hmm

it's a very small, um, island in the, in the middle of the state, you know? 

Um- Yeah, the, the, the ripple effect and n- not to play off a, a water analogy, but since you guys are all there, it's a small space, there is a ripple effect based on how you... how one shows up. It, it makes a difference to everyone around them, even the people that may, that they may not know or, or see, uh, right in their own space.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And being, um, an island, we, we don't have ferry service here. We have small ferry service to, say, Molokai or Lanai. But, um, everyone here works here, helps each other here, and you can't... If you need some other specialty, you can't call people from Oahu and have them drive over. They have to- Yeah

fly over, you know? 

Yes. 

So you've gotta learn how to live within what the, our island has, you know? Yeah. People and commodities, you know, so. 

And, and, and some patience, I imagine, with all that, 

so, yeah. Lots of patience. Yes. It, it's interesting. We've been here for about 35 years, and on the mainland... You know, I remember being on the mainland, and I remember a different mentality.

But here, everything has to be taking, uh, takes time, um, just to get, uh, electrical s- uh, uh, specialist or a plumber or this or that. Sure. Yeah. I mean, there's only so many, and they're all rock stars, and everybody needs them, so you just have to be patient. Gotta be patient, yeah. And, um, and it's just a very kick back, laid back way of life, you know?

Very, very cool. Yeah. Very cool. 

Yeah. 

So let's say you're gathered around, um, your community members there, your friends, as we celebrate America turning 250 as we sit here today. That will be officially, I guess, in two days on Saturday. Uh, but someone would... Uh, maybe someone asks you, "Hey, Rubino, what does America mean to you?"

How do you respond to that question? 

Wow. It, to me, America is an aspirational line of thinking. I feel like most people that are born and raised here or come here, um, really feel like there's nothing you can't accomplish, nothing you can't do. Um, it's a messy, complicated country, but there's the freedom of thought and you're...

I think people come here just to have that feeling, you know? 

Yeah. 

Um- 

A, a, a chance at something. A chance at- A 

chance at something. Just your own- 

A chance at a 

better life, yeah ... yeah, your own motivational ability. You know, what- whatever you feel like you can do, you, you probably can. I mean- You, there's always roadblocks for everything, and there's always rights that some people have and some people don't have.

I mean, it's complicated. But I feel like it, America itself, the word, is an aspirational line of thinking. 

Yeah. No, I hear you on that. Mm-hmm. You mentioned messy, and certainly the stories all families have about either being here in America before it was America or- Mm-hmm ... coming here, uh, we all have a different family story as, as it relates to the country or, or this land.

Do you, do you know much about your family's story- I- ... of America? 

I do. It's very, um, very old. It, a lot of my people landed in Virginia in the 1600s. Okay. 

Wow. 

And they traveled through North Carolina, through the Cumberland Gap, to Tennessee, through to Texas. I grew up in Texas. A lot of my other people, like German background, came to Texas during, in the 1850s during that kind of land grant situation.

So, you know, my people came in covered wagons and ended up in Texas, and I feel like being in Hawaii is just my own pioneering attitude, and you just keep going west, you know? On the- Yeah. 

Absolutely. 

I suppose- Yeah. I suppose further west would be the archipelago, but this is good. Yes. You 

know? This is good.

This is a good place to land. 

Yeah. 

All right. That's great. Wow. Going back to the 1600s, that's remarkable. That's so cool. 

Yeah. Yeah, lots of different people involved, different, uh, Indian tribes, different, um, people from England and Scotland and, um, Africa. We've got all, a whole mix of people, you know, that- Absolutely

were trying to survive- Yeah ... and live in a crazy, new, adventurous situation, which was dangerous and, and- 

Sure ... 

I can only imagine, you know, what they actually went through and what women went through and what, you know. Oh, 

gosh. 

It just must have been crazy. 

Cra- yeah, yeah, cra- crazy and, you know, we, we sometimes have diff- difficulty just wrapping our- our heads around like the current moment that we all share.

But like if you really go back to think about what some of the, the early settlers went through without- Oof ... some of the major conveniences of modern-day life, you're like Yeah ... "What are we talking about?" So it's, yeah- Right? ... it's really, it's really n- really nuts. So, uh, as we sort of stay on this theme of this messiness, I use kintsugi as a metaphor for this series, actually for my Whole Again podcast, knowing that things occasionally do break.

Uh, we have- Mm-hmm ... divisiveness, we have cracks, we have fissures and all that jazz. Mm, mm, mm-hmm. 

And we 

can, we can repair it much like kintsugi and, and, and use these repairs as symbols of our resilience. Mm-hmm. So if you, if you look at the country and right now, is there one thing you would want to see if you could make some progress?

It would... may not be a perfect repair, but a meaningful first step that could help us perhaps heal or at least come together and, and, and connect in a way. 

A couple of things. Um, I feel like if people wore their empathy on their sleeve, um- Mm ... that that would be a huge step forward. It seems like perhaps we used to.

I don't know. I'm not really sure where that stands, because America hasn't always been fair to a lot of groups of people. Absolutely, yeah. So we'll leave, we'll leave that there. But, um, also, uh, you and I growing up, um, had only three news stations- Yes ... where we kinda got unbiased, perhaps unbiased, we, we don't really know, but unbiased, um, actual news.

And I feel like if everyone had, uh, an unbiased, accurate news feed, uh, we perhaps wouldn't be liv- running around living in fear and anxiety of the other person. And- Sure ... I feel like that's probably one of the things that I don't know if it's gonna go back, 'cause we're so... There's so many splinters of news and opinion and all this stuff to where it just, a lot of people need to be angry, and they are.

Yes. And, you know, it's... So trying to get them into another state of mind to where they're empathetic to the other, whatever that is, that would be what I would think would help a lot. But- 

Yeah. I'm with you on that. Other people that I've chatted with in this series have talked about just the, the desire to be more empathetic.

And, and with that, uh, the need to slow down a bit, you know? We're just- Mm ... we seem to be rushing off to somewhere, and then as we're rushing, r- reacting to, as you mentioned, whatever happens to be on our news feed. So there's this constant state of rush and react and rush and react. And then- 

Yeah, and we, you and I- And- Oh, sorry.

Yeah. And then we just have the, the fear grows, and it's like, "Well, you're not like me," or, "I don't think you're like me, so you must be the enemy." And- Yeah ... and then we end up where, we end up in this really wonky, muddy space. 

Yeah. And it's sad, because I feel like it wasn't that long ago we could come around something, like when 9/11 happened.

I mean, I think the whole country felt each other, where- Oh, 

yeah. Yeah ... 

you know, I would hope if something, uh, yeah, I don't want ever that to happen again, but if that something happened like that, would we? I would hope so. I, yeah. You know? So I keep having hope, um- Yeah ... for our most intelligent people in our country to-

to take it back, you know? Like, to- 

Yes, yes. I, I, I- ... be in 

control. 

Yes. I, I, um, I share in your hope that we can find a way out of this, and that we would, we would be able to come together if there was a major crisis. Ins- lo- you know, locally there have been crisis. You, you guys had to deal with the Maui wildfires.

Yeah. 

I imagine as a community you guys did rally together. But something- 

Yeah ... 

you know, from a national perspective of 9/11, really, we, I think we were kinder for a bit until then we started fighting about what to do next. I, um- 

Yeah ... I, 

I, I want, I want to believe that we can, we can find a way to come together even when there isn't a crisis- Yeah

and to start doing it just- 

Just because ... 

just because. It's just, it connects with our desire to be human to each other and, um, kind and, and knowing that we are, you know, at least connected if, if we're not all one, right? And so, 

um- 

Yeah ... 

so- I mean, speaking of the fire- Yeah ... um, the, the aftermath of the fire here, I mean, this community came together like crazy.

It was beautiful. Yeah, 

yeah. 

And then, um, s- conspiracy theories start coming in- Oh ... from outside of here, and it just went haywire, so yeah. Oh, 

that's too bad. That's too bad. I know it's su- such a tra- tragic thing, and some of, some of those outside voices, they may not even be, like, in this country. It could be from- Yeah

outside or just bots- Yeah ... cooking up stuff, you know? That's, I think that's- The 

sowing division. 

Yeah. It's a, just a complicated state of affairs that we all happen to live in. Yeah. So I, I wanna round out our conversation with a, a, a couple different, uh, fun questions. So with a birthday, traditionally we have birthday cake, so this is a two-part question for you.

So what kind of cake are you serving for America's birthday? And then as, as you blow out the candles of this birthday cake, if you choose cake. Many people have not chosen cake. They've, they've picked something else, but if you're blowing out the candles, what are you wishing for? Maybe in addition to greater empathy.

I... Love, you know? It sounds like such a, just a word, but I think love really fixes a lot of that. Breathing deeply, taking time. 

Mm. Um, 

e- especially the bre- the breathing deeply to get your heart full again- Yes, yeah ... and to be full of love to your neighbor and to everyone. 

Mm. 

Um, and feel connected So that's what I want.

And as far as a cake, I would say a cupcake. 

A cupcake. All right, that works. All right, 

uh- Tiny, not too much sugar. 

Not too much sugar, absolutely, absolutely not. So, so as part of this series, I've been asking the person before you, uh, if they have a question for the next person I chat with. So I spoke earlier today to Jessica.

She's from Mississippi. And so she has, I think, a really, um, thought-provoking question. So her question that she wants to serve up to you is, if you could create a museum on anything, what would your museum be about? 

Wow. You never- Yeah ... told me this question. 

I know, it's a little bit of a trick one. So I'm gonna give you some time to sort of think about this.

I didn't know, I didn't know this question was gonna come up until a few hours ago, actually. 

It's very fascinating. Well, I tell you right now, my favorite museums when I was raising my daughter were the science museums- 

Ah ... 

all, all over the country. It's like I found them just as interesting as my daughter did at five years old.

You know? Mm. They were fascinating, they were, um, thought-provoking, and they were fun. Yeah. So I think I would just really, um, being an artist, I'd probably get into color theory or how the eyeball works or, you know? Right. Yeah. Just perception. I love seeing, um, I really love seeing optical art where- Yeah

it's an artwork that y- it tricks your brain and your brain- Yeah ... like sees it differently. Yeah. I think all that's super fascinating. 

Yeah, that is super fascinating 'cause then you can get into the shifting of perspectives and viewpoints, and then you can pull that analogy through to life and how we see, see things.

My wife and I were in Canada the last few days, and we went to this great exhibit about bees. 

Mm. 

And so there was a really cool, um, e- exper- uh, um, it, more, more like an experience where you would put your elbow down on, um, a stand and then put your finger in your ear, and you could hear the buzzing of the bees s- they, it would, it got transmitted through your elbow and through your finger and I'm not exactly- Wow

sure how they did it but- Just the 

vibration? 

Just the vibration. Mm. It was like, oh, wow, that is so, like, wicked cool. It's, it was so awesome. Yeah. So and, and we need to, we need to cherish and protect our bees. So, um- 

Yeah, we have bees on the property, and they, they make, um, honey out of the kiawe flower- Oh, wow

which is very, pretty awesome. 

Yeah, that's, that's so cool. So I wanna give you a shot to ask really any question to the next- Mm ... person I chat with, and it doesn't have to be about America or America 250. Obviously, Jessica's question was more about a museum of choice. 

Mm-hmm. 

So is there any particular question you wanna ask the next person I chat with?

Um, are you, are you breathing deeply? 

Mm. Yeah. 

Does that sound like enough of a question? 

Yeah. 

I mean, I feel like whenever I'm most anxious or I feel like my, my nervous system's a little out of whack, it's like if I can catch that deep divine breath- 

Yes ... 

I can calm my nervous system down and my heart rate down and, um, and turn, uh, maybe a situation into a joyous moment.

Mm-hmm. So it's like, do you, do you have your own mechanism to breathe and get beyond a situation that, um, that you could imagine being better? Like, when I think about how things are in the country now, it's like I really have to breathe deep and just keep imagining things better. Like- Yeah ... uh, how's your imagination?

You know? Yes. Maybe you're breathing, your imagination. Yes. You know, can you imagine this being, like, incredibly awesome? Yes, 

yes. 

Beyond what we see happening, you know? 

Absolutely. Well, as my head says, this is a little m- my thing that I came, that came out of my recovery from my big accident is to, uh, hit pause, press pause, breathe, and then reflect.

So, uh, with that deep breath, you slow, to your point, you slow everything down, and I believe you create a little bit of space. 

Yeah. So- I think we had that in the '80s, you know, before- Yeah ... our phones and all this social media- Yes ... we had, we had to sit there and wait. 

We had to... We did. We had- So- We had to have moments of boredom where that's where creativity can, can bubble up and flourish.

It, it wasn't- Right ... we just didn't, we just stood in line. Well, back, you know, back in the, the '80s we didn't have Starbucks to stand in line for, but like- Right ... they, wait, coffee was a different type of, um, 

product. Just waiting on a phone call. 

Yeah, yeah. It just, we just, we would, we would, um, we would just stand in line and not have to grab our phones and try to occupy every moment.

We were okay with that. And- 

Yeah. There's a, there's a good bumper sticker here that says, "Try wait." 

Oh. 

It's like, just try it. Just try- Yeah ... waiting. 

Just try it, and I, I love it. I love it. Yeah. I think we could use a little bit more of that just to slow life- 

Better bumper stickers. 

Yes. Better bumper... Yes, absolutely.

Better. We need some good, like, 1970s, early '80s bumper stickers just to- 

Yeah. I mean, that might be a good question is, like, what bumper sticker would you make? 

Ah, yeah. Ooh. I might ask that one, too. So, uh- Yeah ... we'll, we'll, we'll pull- 

You can have that. 

I'm kidding ... we'll, we'll pull both of those questions.

Are you breathing deeply? Mm-hmm. And what kind of bumper sticker would you create if you could create any one? So- 

Yeah ... 

well, Robina, mahalo, I should say. Oh, 

hello. So- Ana hui hou. 

Yeah, so I, I really appreciate you sitting down with me and sharing your thoughts. And really, uh, helping us create a more perfectly imperfect union with your energy that you're putting and out into the world, and as well as your art.

Uh, so we have a connection- 

Mm ... 

here from, from Maui to New Jersey. Yay. And I get to look at your beautiful art. 

Well, bless you- Yeah ... and bless the work you're doing. Thank you for inviting me, and thanks for supporting my art. 

Yeah, 

absolutely. I really appreciate it. 

Yeah, absolutely. 

And hello to your beautiful family.

Oh, thank you. I will definitely pass on your, uh, wishes and your energy to them as I head down to dinner here in a few, so, uh- 

Yay ... yeah. Well, please, please come with them when you visit. 

Yes, I, I am due, I'm due for a trip to Maui. Um, as a big cyclist, that's one of my favorite places- Mm-hmm ... to ride my bike. I love going out to West Maui and doing that loop and just- 

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah

wi- you know, feeling my jaw 

drop in awe- ... 

at Mother, Mother Earth's, Mother Nature's 

beauty. It's, it's, uh, on display. It's like, it's, it's... It is jaw-dropping and- Yeah, it's beautiful ... wonderful. 

So gorgeous. So- So gorgeous. Well, thank 

you again. Well, thank you so much. Yep. 

Yes. 

Aloha. Warmest aloha.

I just love Robina's energy, and you probably picked up that we have one of her pieces in our living room. It's such a great reminder of the special memories that my wife and our girls created in Hawaii. Such a great place to visit. It's everything you expect it to be. And so looking up at her art reminds me of those times, and I'm so glad she decided to join us here.

And as a meditation teacher, I totally dig her question, "Are you breathing deeply?" That is a big question. Often we don't do that. We don't even pay attention to our breath. And the second part of her question, "If you could create a bumper sticker, what would you put on it?" So let me know what you would put on your bumper sticker, and I hope you'll check out the next episode of Whole Again, and of course, continue listening in to this series, A Perfectly Imperfect Union, which airs every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.

But until then, let's remember to celebrate our scars as golden symbols of our strength and resilience, and don't forget to have fun storming the castle.

And if you wish to learn more about creating beautiful ripples and how to prevent a bad moment from turning into a bad day, please visit my website, michaelobrienshift.com, and sign up for my newsletter called The Ripple Effect. And join us each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday here at Whole Again, and discover how you can heal, grow, and become more resilient, and celebrate our scars as golden symbols of strength and resilience.

Until then, remember, you can always come back to your breath. You've got this, and

A Perfectly Imperfect Union: Reflecting on America 250 with Robena

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