A Perfectly Imperfect Union: Reflecting on America 250 with Jeffrey Gould

<p> Hey there, it's Michael. Welcome to Whole Again, the show that's here in support of you creating a meaningful life and the person you're becoming. And I'm excited to share a new series with you that will air this summer as America turns 250 years old, which is still pretty young relative to many other countries across this big blue marble that we all share.</p>
<p></p>
<p>The series is called A Perfectly Imperfect Union. In 2022, I rode my bike across America from Astoria, Oregon to the Lincoln Memorial. My wife drove our RV and she had two co-pilots, Jester and Hope, two Springer Spaniels And when we did it, America was coming out of the pandemic and we were hurting.</p>
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<p>Hurting from things that had happened prior to the pandemic, of course, going through what we all went through. And at that time, and this is something I still believe today, is that we were entering an inflection point. An inflection point for us to hopefully pause, breathe, and reflect on who we wish to become as individuals, as communities, and as a country.</p>
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<p>As I pedaled across America, I wanted to share America's beauty with others, her natural beauty and the beauty of her people. And I also wanted to share where we were hurting As America turns 250, I believe Kintsugi, which is something we use as a metaphor here at Whole Again, is a perfect metaphor for where we are as a country.</p>
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<p>There's so much beauty to celebrate, and we can also acknowledge that parts of us feel broken or are broken. But we can find a way to come back together, just like Kintsugi teaches us. And when we do, we don't try to erase or cover up where we have scars or blemishes. We highlight them in gold, and we celebrate them as symbols of our strength and resilience.</p>
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<p>Kintsugi is called the golden repair, and in essence, we can see beauty in something that's perfectly imperfect. During this series, I plan to speak to at least two people in each state and the District of Columbia, so 102 conversations with real folk, as I like to say. We're gonna let the celebrities and the big influencers have their day somewhere else.</p>
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<p>But here, I wanna reach out and talk to real people and listen to their reflections as they think about America turning 250 years old. And my hope is, is that you'll tune in to at least one, if not all 102, 'cause my theory going into this is that you'll hear different perspectives. Some may be aligned with yours, others may not, but my hope is that you hear the goodness in your fellow citizens and realize, as Maya Angelou shared with us, "We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike."</p>
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<p>We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike. I've had the privilege of traveling all over the world and all over this country, and this belief is something that I hold deep inside of me. So yes, I do believe that we are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike. So if you're ready to get to know one of your fellow neighbors who is perfectly imperfect like all of us, take a healthy breath in and a slow releasing breath out and get to know Jeffrey Gould.</p>
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<p>Uh, Jeff, my friend, welcome to A Perfectly Imperfect Union. Thank you for being here, and thank you for accepting a random outreach on LinkedIn to join me on this series. So how the heck are you today? </p>
<p></p>
<p>I'm good. You know, uh, social media is e- either your bane or your boost. It's, it's amazing. It's like a big cafe you can walk into, and occasionally you'll strike up a conversation with a person you never would have met another way, and I think this is one of those.</p>
<p></p>
<p>I definitely think this is one of those. So I, I have read up on, like, the great stuff that you're doing and sharing of stories and also just ster- sharing of the Am- American story. Uh, so I know a little bit about you, but for those that don't know who you are, can you take a moment to introduce yourself?</p>
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<p>And also, where the heck are you in this great country of ours? </p>
<p></p>
<p>Well, I'm in South Dakota, which doesn't help many people 'cause they go, "Well..." Here's a trivia question for you, Michael. I get it asked all the time. People will come up to me and say, "You know, I've been to every other state in the union except two."</p>
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<p>And I say, "Let me stop you right there." "You've not been to North or to South Dakota." "Well, how did you know that?" </p>
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<p>Yes. Yeah, that's a very common one. Or maybe Al- Al- Alaska, 'cause that is so f- </p>
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<p>Yeah ... </p>
<p></p>
<p>far away from the </p>
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<p>rest of us. No, they'll, they'll say, "Yeah, I did an Alaska tour. Yeah, but I've never been..." Yeah, yeah.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. "Been to Hawaii." Yeah, yeah. Yes. I get it. I get it. I get it. So I'm a common trivia question. Uh, y- I, I will say that I, I happened to be alive for the bicentennial, uh, when we were 200 years old, and I thought that when we hit 250 it was gonna be a big deal. And it has not been a big deal. And that makes me deeply sad, because it's a really cool story.</p>
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<p>I mean, it's not... I, I would say, Michael, that Americans are very idealistic people, and when things aren't perfect, we don't like it. And as any parent or teacher will tell you, if you're talking to a kid, you gotta say five positives to one negative, or else they get demoralized. And for reasons that are puzzling to me, we are beating up on ourselves about things that kind of are common to humankind, and we have decided that we are horrible people.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And I just wanted... So I, I started this process of telling America's story because, uh, sometimes people forget their own personal story, their company's story, and it's about what your, what your strengths are, what the obstacles are, and how you can overcome that to live the best possible version of your own story.</p>
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<p>And I do think that 1,000 years after this story's done, they'll still be talking about the story. "You know, this guy was amazing." And, and the day after this story is done, there will be a light out in the world and people will say, "Oh, no Yeah. Anyway, that's my thought. </p>
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<p>Yeah. Thanks for sharing. Yeah, we, we do, uh, we do tend to beat ourselves up, and we tend to be idealistic.</p>
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<p>And I'm too. I was, I was around back in 1976, and I, I thought 250 was gonna be a big deal as well, and it's a little bit of a meh, you know? Like, and so that's one of the reasons why I decided to do this, is just talk to everyday folks and make connections this way. </p>
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<p>And- Well, I think it's- Yeah ... it's a ques- it's a que- because we have social media, we have the algorithm, we have- Yes</p>
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<p>and we know this, that, um, if I post something that's, uh, you know, outlandish, I'll get more clicks, and I can actually make money doing that. So it's not that people are being rude just because they wanna be. There's money in being rude. So we have people at both sides of the spectrum saying horrible things, and it's like being at a restaurant and hearing that couple next to you arguing.</p>
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<p>It's both very enticing, but also uns- uh, it's nerve-wracking. We gotta get outta here. Yeah, it's unsettling. It's unsettling, </p>
<p></p>
<p>yes. </p>
<p></p>
<p>It's unsettling. Yes. Yes. And nine- 90% of Americans agree the same thing. We, we want, we want our kids to have a, a decent life. We want them to be safe. We want to ha- find something that's fulfilling.</p>
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<p>And, you know, you do that through a democracy. Democracy, you know, was something that you could find in small villages or cities, right? You could do it in Rome, do it in Greece, maybe in a tribe you'd have that. But the concept of getting 13 colonies spread up and down the Eastern Seaboard with almost no travel to get them to set up a nation based on democracy was both ridiculous, impossible, and yet we did it.</p>
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<p>We did it. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. And to, and, and to today, half of the countries in the world will at least pay lip service to democracy because right now people say, "Well, if you wanna have a good government, you w- you, you start with democracy." They'll say that. </p>
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<p>Yeah. Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And, and that was not the case, you know, 300 years ago.</p>
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<p>300 years ago, well, we ha- we have a king, we hope he's a good one. We have a queen. Well, she's kind of a tyrant, but it's what- ... it is what it is. </p>
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<p>It is </p>
<p></p>
<p>what it is. Yeah. And now the entire world says, "We can and we deserve better." And that's part of our story. It's, it's really cool. </p>
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<p>Yeah. No, it, it really is cool.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And it, and by design it was sort of gonna be messy right from the get-go. It was- Yeah ... it was complicated, messy. There was debates and arguments and, uh, disagreements and compromise and collaboration, but it wasn't, it wasn't easy-peasy lemon squeezy, as- No ... the kids would say. So </p>
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<p>it was- And, and- Yeah ... and so much of it is make it up as you go along.</p>
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<p>I mean, like, what, what, what, uh, you know, like for example, when the first president died in office, well, the vice president took over the duties but didn't take over the office. Yeah. So then like the Supreme just Court... Oh, oh, why don't I just sneak you in? So, so- And, and, and the idea of cabinets and the idea of political parties, I mean, all of this st- and, and amendments all kind of ha- have gone on as we've made it, as we've gone.</p>
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<p>And it's gotten a little more clarified, a little more locked down- And also still messy because so much of what we did was based on kinda tradition. This is what we do. You know, for example- </p>
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<p>Yeah, this is the way, yeah, yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah ... you know, two, two terms as president, that should be enough. That's it. Well, it was good enough for George, good enough for us.</p>
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<p>Well, then we had to lock it down and make it part... A- a- and, and so we're trying to decide, do we need to legislate this stuff? Do we need to just let it work this way? A- and all the time, all the time, for 250 years, Americans have fought with each other- Yeah ... all of the time, and they've fought with each other 'cause it's a cool story.</p>
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<p>It's a cool story. Yeah, absolutely. I've been asking people in this series what America means to them. If you were asked that question, uh, how would you respond? </p>
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<p>Possibility. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Mm. I </p>
<p></p>
<p>mean, what you can do with this, it's like a Swiss Army knife, what you can do with this thing. Man, I </p>
<p></p>
<p>like that analogy, yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>I mean, you, you can just say wow.</p>
<p></p>
<p>I mean, look at the, um, look at the innovation that you can make with this interesting tool. It, it, it's really hard to make in other nations in the world, but you can go here and you can figure out... I mean, look at all the inventions that, you know, kinda seem to happen. Business seems to work a little bit better.</p>
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<p>Um, social things, you know, like, um, you know, national parks. We invented national parks. Oh, interesting. Um, we have many grassroots organizations. If you were to look at the service clubs and just run down the list, almost all of them started here. Um, movements. It, it, it's, it's... I- if you wanna do something, y- y- you love your homeland, you do, you do, but if things go south and, and, and, and you go, you look around the table and say, "Well, what do you think?</p>
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<p>Should we try America?" And for 250 years they've tried it </p>
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<p>They've tried it, yeah </p>
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<p>And, and, and it's not, it's not a once in a, in a thousand. All of the time. It, it's like, it's like we know it. The first generation comes here, they don't speak the language, they get a crummy job. There's discrimination. Their kids, you know, they learn both languages, and by the time the grandkids show up, they don't even speak the first language.</p>
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<p>Yeah. </p>
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<p>And, and they're, and they're... They don't, they don't even care about the homeland. They're, they're 100% Americans. And the first guy dug ditches, and the second guy worked at a job, and the third guy is a doctor or lawyer, right? It's just, it just, it's common. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. Yeah. That's, that is part of the common story.</p>
<p></p>
<p>So I know a lot of families, uh, every family has their own family story with, uh, this land, this country. Uh, some were here well before it was America. Some were brought here, forced here through slavery and others, other families immigrated here. Do you know much about your family's story with the country?</p>
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<p>I got a box back here. </p>
<p></p>
<p>I love, I love when someone says, "I have a box back here." It means that there is, there's an arc- you know, a archive of a wealth of information. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Uh, and, and most of it is like, eh. So I, I believe, um, theoretically on my dad's side, uh, Abner Pease was a captain in the revolutionary army out in New York.</p>
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<p>Hmm. </p>
<p></p>
<p>To do that and to become a member of the DAR, uh, you need to prove that. And my grandmother, who was somewhat of a force of nature, uh, was a member of the DAR, but I think she kinda ramrodded it through based on just force of will. So that, that, that might be a rumor. We'll see. We'll see. Well, </p>
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<p>they'll...</p>
<p></p>
<p>We'll, we'll go with that, you know? </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. Yeah. And I think that, I think isn't it interesting that when you ask people, you know, what, what their longevity might be, they'll pick the grandparent that lived the longest. </p>
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<p>Yes. </p>
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<p>And I think as Americans, we, we pick the guy who came here first, right? Uh, I would say on my mom's side, we're looking at, you know, middle 1800s, um, Germany.</p>
<p></p>
<p>One of, one of the things I, I didn't really know was that, um, you know, for a lot of years, uh, kings tried to keep their serfs because they were the labor force. And so, you know, "No, you're not leaving our country." And then they had these famines and things, and, and then they said, "Well, get out of here, and, you know, kick...</p>
<p></p>
<p>And, and go to America. You're a problem. Leave us alone." And I think a wave of various famines and issues in the middle 1800s was, was the cause of a lot of, uh, are they older Americans? You know, you know, one of the waves. You know, Italy or France or Germany or, you know, pick your, pick your spot, right?</p>
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<p>Absolutely. Yeah. I, I was part of that Irish wave, you know, coming over. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And, and you know, you look at the stuff back then, you know, no Irish allowed. I mean, it was, I mean, it, it... The, the, um, you know, the, the, the, the ra- I guess you wouldn't say... I, I guess it's racism, right? It, it is. E- every, everybody gets, um- Ha- has a part of that story </p>
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<p>Everybody...</p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah, there, there, uh, a long history of certain groups be- becoming the, the, the bottom of the status, you know, uh, pole or curve or what have you, and- </p>
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<p>And, and you, you like, you like the American concept of trying to even out that playing field. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yes. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And we've done a, we've done a better job than many. I mean, if you were to, um...</p>
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<p>I'll just say that there, there's 100% certainty that one of my ancestors was a slave, and a 100% certainty that one of my ancestors owned slaves. Because every single nation, you know, st- until, like, about, you know, 500 years ago, that's simply what you did. </p>
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<p>Yes. It </p>
<p></p>
<p>wasn't right, and now we say, "Well, that's not right."</p>
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<p>Well, that's true, that's not right, but that's a fairly new concept. All of us have that, um, shared suffering and blight. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Mm-hmm. Yep. There, we, uh... Our stories are embedded in each other's stories. And, uh, if we can simply see that, I think we can find a way to feel more or be more connected. Uh, so- </p>
<p></p>
<p>I, I like, I like cur- Yeah I, I, one of the factors I inherited from my mother is curiosity.</p>
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<p>Mm. </p>
<p></p>
<p>So I'm like, you know, before there was a Progressive commercial, there was me. I'm the guy who st- And, and South Dakotans are like this. We will stop you and ask you questions, uh, because there aren't many people here, and- ... uh, we, we just are curious people. </p>
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<p>Are you guys, are you guys a lo- you're lonely and curious.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Um, uh, we are curious. Uh, we are a little stubborn. Um- </p>
<p></p>
<p>Okay ... </p>
<p></p>
<p>we're not gonna be, you know, um- Ain't nobody gonna tell us what to do. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Uh-huh. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And one of the things that, uh, you're not gonna tell us is, is that we're not gonna be curious or friendly either. I mean, it's not- Yeah ... you know, we, we will come up to you and say, "You got a New Jersey plate.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Where you from?" And then we will ask with genuine curiosity, "Why are you here?" </p>
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<p>Why are you here? Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Because, you know, uh, and we will... This, this humility. Uh, we, we're not gonna say, "I heart New York," or, "Don't mess with Texas." We honestly wonder, "Why in the world did you come here?" And then you'll tell us the trivia question about you never been there before, and then we'll say, "Well, hey," and we'll point out some sights.</p>
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<p>And, and probably what we will, what we don't understand about our state is what is the greatest allure, is the horizons, the sky, the starscape. I mean, you can drive out... I, I live in, I live in Sioux Falls. Okay, Sioux Falls is a town of about 230,000, and you would hear that and you would say town. And I would say back to you that Sioux Falls is the largest city in South Dakota, North Dakota, Montana, Wyoming, and, um...</p>
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<p>And, and you gotta go all the way to Boise, Idaho before you get a city that's about the same size. </p>
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<p>Wow. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And all of us scattered across in between see something that you may not: the Milky Way The Milky Way. W- w- we will, you will look at the, the star, the, you know, big sky country isn't just in Montana. You, you see the clouds, and you see, uh, you see small breathtaking things that if you want to can look boring, but if you choose to, are mesmerizing </p>
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<p>Imagine you guys get jaw-dropping sunsets.</p>
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<p>But my experience going across the country, when I rode my bike across the country, I, I experienced a little bit of that curiosity in other states. But what I also discovered is that although California might think they have the best sunsets, it's actually in states like Kansas and Nebraska and Montana and Wyoming, and I, I too have not been to South Dakota and North Dakota.</p>
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<p>Um, but I imagine I am part of your trivia answer or trivia question. But I imagine you, you get just, just awe-inspiring sunsets </p>
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<p>Uh, you ride a bicycle, uh, and, and, uh, you, what you get is something that is rare for people. You get a chance to observe an entire day. Okay? </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yes. </p>
<p></p>
<p>So you get up and you feel the chill of the dew and the, or sunrise, and you start m- bicycling, and, and what you're noticing i- is the terrain.</p>
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<p>You're noticing maybe the soil, what it looks like. You're seeing the plants. You're, you're noticing the, the birds. And then gradually it heats up, and it gets to be about noon, and the sun is straight up, and you pull over to some little town and you pull into a cafe. If you're smart, you don't go to a franchise.</p>
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<p>You find the cafe. And you walk into the cafe, and just like cattle, they all look at you curiously when you walk in. And eventually, just like cattle, one of them kinda noses over and says, "Well, what are you doing here?" And then they'll talk a little bit about their town And you will be the talk of supper that night.</p>
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<p>And then it will be the heat of the day baking down on you hot. And then gradually, gradually you'll see the shadows stretch across. And then suddenly it'll be that first chill of the evening. And then you will have seen something that is rare. You will have seen a day. Now, you could theoretically do it in a chair.</p>
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<p>You could just sit on the... But you won't do that. I did it in a convertible, which gives me some advantage. I have a little Mazda Miata Roadster, and my wife and I did a 30-day trip, 6,978 miles, and we always did it on the scenic route 55 miles an hour. Now, we didn't have to do the physical exertion like you did, Michael.</p>
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<p>We had some of the risk of safety because it's a small car. But we also could look straight up and we would see, you know, the birds circling overhead and you would just see... And then people say, "What did you see?" I saw America. Well, but what did you see? You know, where did you go? And it's all about the destination.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And I say, no, it's a metaphor. It is truly the journey and the people you talk to and the small conversations. It was I recommend it </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah, no, I, I, I too recommend it to those listening. I, um, I had a moment just as you described. As I was going through the Midwest, a little game I would play. In the beginning, I could see a farm in the distance.</p>
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<p>I could see the grain silos, and maybe it was a, a town too. And I would try to predict like, "Okay, how far away am I from that place?" And in the beginning, I was so far off. I... It was one of these, um, optical illusions where I thought I was closer, but it was like so far away. By the end of my trip, I got really good.</p>
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<p>I was like, "Oh no, that's like, uh, it's about 15 miles, 20 miles away, or 10 miles away." And there's one, there's one story that comes to mind as you were sharing, you know, y- this, um, your, your trip experience as well. I came into, uh, Rushville, Indiana. It was hotter than Hades. It was a humid day. The corn was already growing, so the humidity comes from the corn.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And I went into the Moose Cafe and Antiques, and I was all in my cycling gear, and I put my bike on the telephone, uh, the post, the light post outside, and I walk in and there's a group of 12 local people in Rushville celebrating their 200th anniversary as a town. And I walk up to the counter and order my coffee and muffin, and as I wait, one of the women at the table was like, "Hey, biker guy, come over here.</p>
<p></p>
<p>We have questions for you." And all 12 of them started to pepper me with questions like, "What are you doing? Where are you going? Why are you here? Why our town? Are you crazy?" And, and as I left, by this time the whole cafe, which included probably another 15 other people having morning coffee, they were all eavesdropping into this conversation.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Sure they were. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And every single one of them, except for this table of three boys, as I left, they all said, "God bless you Bless you. You know, it was like, it was b- basically it was their way of saying like, you know, may God look out for you, uh, safe travels, um, I see you, w- you know, we're connected now. And it was like, I was like, that, we need more of that in, in the world </p>
<p></p>
<p>You know, you go on vacation and you think, well, we're going to go visit this place, but what you really want is what you j- what you had.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>That, that is what you want. And, and one of the things that I would say, and I'm a lifelong M- Midwesterner, when I visit larger cities, I see people who apparently look at people as potential dangers or adversaries. So they do not e- engage in eye contact. You, you see them out of the corner of your-- You will not look at them because they could be dangerous or at least a nuisance.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And then you sit on the plane and I'm not gonna talk to that person because they're gonna be annoying or a nuisance. If you live in a part of the country where there aren't many people, you learn something, that everybody has a story. And if you could just be a little bit curious I- in South Dakota, we, we have, um, one degree of separation, and we all know it.</p>
<p></p>
<p>You know, the Kevin Bacon, he's related- Yeah. ... to six guys in Hollywood. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yes, yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>If you talk to a South Dakotan who will talk to another South Dakotan, if they want to, if they have the time, in 15 minutes they'll talk about... eventually find the same person that they know. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yep. Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Oh, you're from Elk Point.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Do you know mm, mm, okay. </p>
<p></p>
<p>So and so, yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah, yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Like, "Oh, I went, I went to, I went to school with his brother," you know? </p>
<p></p>
<p>Like- Yes. And that's a, that's a s- an enjoyable pastime. It's kinda like putting puzzles together. It's an, "Oh, that piece goes here." </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And, and, and there is a joy in that. There is a, there's a humanity in that.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And one of the reasons I, I love your concept and was eager to be on the program is that you are doing that. You are figuring out how to join people together. Now, we're not meeting in a cafe, but aren't we kinda having that conversation now? Aren't... Are there people eavesdropping on that conversation- Absolutely, </p>
<p></p>
<p>yeah</p>
<p></p>
<p>and going, and going, "Huh, maybe we should take that road trip. Maybe we-" Yeah ... "should do that." I'll say this, I, I, I didn't, um... I don't think I put it in my bio. I've done a lot of things with my life, but one of them is I will be a eulogist at funerals. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Oh. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And, and I've done 700. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Wow. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And I, I, I never kept official track.</p>
<p></p>
<p>I will meet with a family today for a funeral tomorrow. It's probably 700. And the, uh, the biggest emotion at a funeral, and one of the reasons that I'm a professional speaker too, is because of the lessons I learned from those lives. And the number one emotion at a funeral is not sorrow. It is regret, and usually for what's not done.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And the thing that they talk about the most, Michael, is the road trip, that there's some epic road trip that the person did. And my, my suggestion to anyone who's listening, why don't you do it? </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>I mean, go, stop, stop the tape or go home unfinished. Find your significant other, pull out a calendar and say, "When are we going?"</p>
<p></p>
<p>And I don't care if it's next year or the year after. Eventually, the calendar's gonna be empty, and I would circle an entire whopping month, and you're not gonna go... I mean, you could. Good, good for you. Go to Europe like everybody else. Ride a cruise ship like everybody else. But if you're smart, you're gonna do what you did, and you're gonna find off the beaten path, and you're gonna look for those conversations, and that will be, that'll be the road trip.</p>
<p></p>
<p>My, one of my trauma room nurses back with my big accident came to visit me in the, after I left the ICU of the hospital I was at in Albuquerque And she, she told me, "Hey, Michael, like none of us are promised tomorrow. Make sure the people in your life, um, know that you love them daily." And it... But basically her message was like, "Hey, you're not promised tomorrow, so get out there.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Like when you can leave the hospital, get out there and like live. Live. Do the thing." And I would say, I would echo your comments, uh, take the trip. Uh, do it before it's too late. </p>
<p></p>
<p>You know, you wouldn't think that suffering could be a blessing, but a lotta times it is. If you hadn't been hit by that Ford Ranger, what kinda life would you have led?</p>
<p></p>
<p>Interesting, right? </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. Oh, absolutely. No, I... You know, people have asked me over the years, you know, hey, if I could turn back time. You know, it's the, it's the turn back time question. Would you turn back time and make it all go away? And I was like, uh, I was... I answer absolutely not, because it's, it, it wa- it was, for me, and hopefully it's not as painful for others, but for me, uh, whatever was sent was painful enough to shift my perspective on how I was approaching life.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Uh, 'cause I was, I was, you know, going through the motions like every Tom, Dick or Harry, you know? And, uh, I needed a little bit of a jolt, and the universe sent me the jolt that I, I needed. So, um, yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>And I, I was, I was more blessed and maybe more fortunate in that all I had to do was watch game tape. 700 lives on game tape, fast-forward, fast-forward, and then look at that, look at that, whoop, whoop, what, ah.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And just, I didn't have to have cancer to know what it'd be like to be a cancer survivor. I didn't have to have calamity to know what calamity felt like. I didn't have to live an empty life. I saw it lived. And, and just as your, you know, uh, nurse came up to you afterwards, so, you know, I'll say God came up to me and said, "What, you know, what are you doing?</p>
<p></p>
<p>What are you..." I mean, like, you know, when people say this, "You're not cut out for this, you're not cut out for that," and it always sounds like it's a derogatory, like an insult But maybe you're not. Maybe God cut you out as a beautiful pattern, and it, it, he wants you to do what that is. And if he says, "You know, quit, quit working for the man.</p>
<p></p>
<p>W- w- work for the man who made you, who cut you out to a purpose." And I'm not saying it's easy. I mean, uh, obviously I'm, I'm a professional storyteller. Most people think I go to libraries and speak to little children, right? They just, they're j- they're kinda demeaning about it. But that's okay, because I know what I was cut out to do.</p>
<p></p>
<p>I was cut out to encourage people and tell stories, and you're living what God cut you out to do. And, and, and, and maybe people listen, go like, "Wait a minute. What am I cut out to do?" And that is the most important question. Hmm. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yes. So we'll, we'll finish up our conversation here with a question from a previous guest on the series.</p>
<p></p>
<p>So yesterday I was speaking with Tiffany, who lives in DC, and so she has a question for you. It's a way of, like, passing- </p>
<p></p>
<p>Sure ... </p>
<p></p>
<p>the baton from neighbor to neighbor, state to state. So her question is: If, if someone really knew you, what would they know about you? </p>
<p></p>
<p>If they really knew me. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yeah. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Well, I'm somewhat of an open book.</p>
<p></p>
<p>It's hard to... I mean, I, I, I am what I am. Um. I mean, I, uh, intentionally I t- I try to remove the mask as best as I can. I would say that most people, um, they will even- I- if you live a good life, they're gonna think that you're a good guy, and you never have any doubts, and you never have any fears, and you never have any anxieties.</p>
<p></p>
<p>I think those people would be unaware of the anxieties that nag me every single day I'm a person who has anxieties. Now, I'm also a person who practices optimism and encouragement, and I use that with energy and I plan, and it's simply my strategy to deal with a constant nagging doubt, maybe even self-loathing and anxiety based on the observations of who I really am, not that, not that big a deal, and some of the negative things that people have said to me a long time ago that still are thorns.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Welcome to the human race. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Yes. </p>
<p></p>
<p>So, uh, yes. What question would you like to ask the next person I chat with in this series? </p>
<p></p>
<p>I could as a f- as a question, maybe facetiously, have you been to South Dakota? But I know the answer. </p>
<p></p>
<p>I will definitely, I will definitely ask that question. Uh, but you get to ask- But here's-</p>
<p></p>
<p>the second one. Yeah ... </p>
<p></p>
<p>here's, here's, here it is. Um, uh, what's the best piece of advice you ever got? </p>
<p></p>
<p>All right. I will ask that of the next person I talk to in the series. Jeff, thank you so much for joining me and creating a beautiful ripple effect in the world and helping us become a more perfectly imperfect union.</p>
<p></p>
<p>I appreciate you and what you're doing. And so thank you. And, uh, thank you for being here. </p>
<p></p>
<p>Thank you, Michael. God bless you. </p>
<p></p>
<p>God bless.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Isn't Jeffrey amazing? My gosh, I could have spoken to him for hours. I'm so glad I found him and we were able to connect. We have now traveled into South Dakota, and I need to get my butt to South Dakota so I'm not part of his trivia question. But all joking aside, simply loved our conversation. Let me know what you took away from it, and how would you answer his questions at the end?</p>
<p></p>
<p>First one, have you been to South Dakota? And the second one is what's the best piece of advice you've ever been given? Let me know in the comment section below. And as always, thanks for listening. Thank you for being here. I hope you'll check out the rest of our series as we travel around America speaking to everyday folks trying to figure it out, but taking steps to do so, like Jeffrey, about their reflections of America as she's turned 250 years old.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And don't forget to tune in to my episodes on Whole Again. They're all designed to help you step into the person you're becoming and live a meaningful life. But until all that, let's celebrate our scars as golden symbols of our strength and resilience, and don't forget to have fun storming the castle.</p>
<p></p>
<p>And if you wish to learn more about creating beautiful ripples and how to prevent a bad moment from turning into a bad day, please visit my website, michaelobrienshift.com, and sign up for my newsletter called The Ripple Effect. And join us each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday here at Whole Again, and discover how you can heal, grow, and become more resilient, and celebrate our scars as golden symbols of strength and resilience.</p>
<p></p>
<p>Until then, remember, you can always come back to your breath. You've got this, and we've got you.</p>